Apple pie oatmeal

So if you follow my activities on the interweb, you might’ve seen that I did some porridge testing for the Hackney Post and my sister blog earlier this week.


It was all great, don’t get me wrong. I love anything starchy and warm. I spent an entire term in Sheffield coming up with intricate oat recipes after blowing most of my allowance on gin and Dominoes in the first week.


What I found weird was that despite everyone going nuts for these itty bitty shots of gloopy goodness, few people seem to do this stuff at home.

My friend Alice invited me to the event so she could cover it for another website. She told me she’s a big lover of porridge. I asked her her favourite recipe:


“Oh, you know, just like a bit of sugar or something”.



I realise simplicity can be beautiful, but come on. This is why people don’t eat it every day. Have you ever tried eating just plain porridge on it’s own for a week straight? It’s really fucking boring.


Why would you happily pay up to a fiver for someone to throw some honey and dates into a bowl of oats for you, but you wouldn’t do it yourself?


It’s madness. It’s excess. It must be stopped.

Which is why I’m sharing this with you today. This is one of the first recipes I made when I was trying to get fit over the summer last year. It’s a really good one for gently getting back on the healthy wagon. It’s what I eat if I’ve been binging on the aforementioned gin and Dominoes for a few months days.


The great thing about this recipe is that it’s really just a base. Use this as a starting point for making your breakfasts more interesting and be prepared to experiment. You don’t have to peel the apples if it’s too much effort. I did for this recipe but usually I’d just go at it with a cheese grater skin on and it breaks down just fine.

Apple Pie Oatmeal 

Servings: 2

Time: 20 minutes (5 mins prep, 15 mins cooking)


40g rolled oats

1/8 cup polenta

1 medium apple, peeled

1 cup of milk of choice

1 cup of water

1tsp nutmeg

1 1/2tsp cinnamon

1tsp vanilla extract

2tbsp sugar or honey


  1. peel, core and cut apple into half. Chop one half into small, fingernail-sized pieces. Squeeze lemon and leave to one side.
  2. Set a sauce pan with 1 cup of water on medium/high. Grate apple into water. Add vanilla extract, cinnamon and nutmeg. Boil for 5 minutes or until the apple starts to break down and is easily mashed with a wooden spoon. Add apple chunks, 1tbsp of honey/sugar and continue to boil for another 5 minutes.
  3. Add oats, semonlina and milk to pan and cook for 5 minutes until the porridge is a consistency you like. You can continue to add milk/water if you think it’s drying out too early or you like it runnier. Add remaining honey/sugar to taste.
  4. Serve with an extra dash of milk and cinnamon.


BRB, just throwing out some pizza boxes.

Apple pie oatmeal

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